its no longer something i could handle...

i shall just act as u wish~~

as long as u think is alright...

i shall follow u ..without any doubt...

no matter how i dun like



at this point.. i just hope u realize it urself...

for u..i can be just like wat u wan me to be

Its Christmas eve, 24th of December of the year
at this moment ..usually ppl will start to recall wat had happen the whole year

so do i, actually 23rd..just a few hours back.. i happen to anger someone..
or i shudnt use the word anger...simply just made her become unstable emotion
due to the existence of this blog...

well.. i do not wat word i shud be spilling out onto this post..because
i have tons of emotion i been through just in 12 hours.. but to be honest ..
this is the first time i feel its nice...

not being a bias or wat... i been through a rough day with hard smile in lot events..
but usually it somehow something i would not try again.. because even it come with laughter .. i will rather nvr try again

but today, diff.. i wan to spill myself with emotion.. to feel that u are at the top of the world.. but the other second u are so deep ur voice cant reach others... even though obviously making it often is not a good action after all ..i do not think i can handle it =)

life is so much fun if its always like today, .. a great love.. a hand to hold on.. a shoulder to lean on.. a joke to laugh on.. an anger to tear on..a chatter that nvr end.. and last but not least.. a great companion that will nvr bored of u and u wont bored of her ..because the existence of emotion...

i feel so lively, even though its not a perfect night.. or a perfect occasion.. but like wat wise said..nothing is perfect..because we are imperfect.. we expect better in future..and every achievement... it bring joy

i hope we step ahead every single moment, side by side.. and achieve what we dream of =)
in the coming future ....

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR...

p/s : especially u, i am glad to through end of this year.. with ur smile... =)

sometimes i will get very puzzle with ppl thought of me

its like when ppl acting and talk like u are a part of them but at a point u fully believe
and also accepted this fact...

they could just walk off... it might not be an action, simply just express a thought to u
or simply just a phrase ..is enough to doubt the entire thing from beginnning to the end

wat is all this? it isnt exactly real but not fake as well,.. because there isnt any prove what is fake and wat isnt..

if such thing existed/...will i have the right ? the courage to feel it? to be emotional of it...

why does another person love to use so minor action to bring such a big impact.. i am not fragile, i simply just too vulnerable...

i am a pro in keeping myself under control, but i am weak in letting ppl making me out of control...

sometimes, i rather just feeeel... no words, no action, blinded as well...

at least, u wont be expecting that much...

i had nothing at all~

sometimes i also need to be pamper...

why cant someone just let me release..

why whenever its obviously i wan u to cheer u up..

u not gonna do it??

now..here i am

smoking again... why is it ciggarette became my dearest

when i already had u ~~~

Dissapointed

i dislike ppl saying they are dissapointed to me

I ALREADY DID MY BEST!!!

WAT U ALL WAN FROM ME!!

"i am dissapointed of u "

IT IS A SENTENCE ENOUGH TO LET ME HAVE A CHEST PAIN

DO U KNOW HOW HURT IT IS??

U ARE DIGGING ALL MY PAST!! ALL MY SADNESS!!

U MAKE ME THIS BIG MAN WANTED TO CRY SO MUCH~~~

plz...its a harsh word~~~

arh!!!~~~~

Arrogant me~

how long since i ever have a feeling of unable to resolve wat i really wanted
its been long long long since i can remember..

like wise says , wat u gain is same with wat u lost , everything comes in a round, whether clockwise
or anti-clockwise, sweet first pain later, or even pain first sweet later.. every sacrifice u did come with the same amount of gain u get~ and every benefit u got is no different with how much u are going to pay for it..

actually, i expected something is gonna happen and thing will become very rough.. but it just a lack of readyness to prepare for it.. new stuff, new experience, problem thats nvr been touch in ur life time.. it do not make me curious anymore, it make me fear them, avoid them, or even forget about it...

why and how had it been that way? i would like to know..but its not a matter of that.. its a matter of every problems need a solution, and a solution of problems nvr gonna be easy to be found out~

so wat u do? skip it or come back to it later~
hmmm.. ppl thinks that i shud concentrate on the very first problem that occur
but now..i would like to be a bit arrogant... and doing stuff ppl usually do in exam hall

skip and come back later~~

Be Strong

i would say i have a shock last night..
maybe i am not prepared for this...
eventhough i could understand why she is acting like that
she been through too much.. too much that even myself couldnt step into her world
her shoes..to understand her life..

i do not have the right to spill her with all the wisdom words
because even myself wasnt in the position to say so..
me too have a tradegy of past that i need to overcome..
life is indeed tough.. some ppl suffer less, some people suffer more
but is a sure thing everyone do suffer from their corner of their world..

but it have been more clearer that i shud overcome watever i had been through
so i could throw it aside and help the one i love to step back to a better self
and gain happiness..

i love u .. plz dun hurt urself..as it hurt it real back to me...